This is the personal blog of Adam J. Schirling, the founder and editor-in-chief of Drunken Absurdity, a revolutionary ezine. For the best in alternative literature, poetry, art, movies and more go to www.drunkenabsurdity.com. This blog is strictly for my personal rants, some dirty pics, and the occasional cool story or sweet tunes.

Fucking truth

>> Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I mean, no offense, but you got a shitty job, you’re not nearly as tall as me, nobody really respects you. You have me on the other hand. I got the glory, I got the fame, the deals, the fans, the strippers, the balls. Getting drunk on the reg, fucking good times on the reg, yachts on the reg, sex on the reg... Basically all the shit that most guys fantasize about

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International Paper Camera Project

>> Friday, February 24, 2012


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Sam Adams Brewery tour




Had some friends from back home in Vegas coming to Boston for a couple of days, so we headed out to the fabled Sam Adams brewery, long a drinking destination that I have yearned to see. Upon first glance, the collection of plain, worn red brick buildings in the Jamaica Plain section of the town is very unimpressive. Just a single small sign identifies it as the first brewery opened by the craft beer pioneer himself Jim Koch. The tour, by the way, is free; so immediately a selling point for a broke writer such as myself.

Inside was a wonderful collection of American craft beer history. Our knowledgeable guide was a middle aged cheery New England woman, who had a plethora of information, and was able to greatly describe all the scientific process involved in brewing. Everywhere you turned, there was other equally cheerful employees. I mean, how the fuck couldn't you be happy, working in a brewery that encourages their employees to drink a glass a day.



The tour ended in the tasting room, where we received a free 7 oz sampler cup, and were given three full pours of different Sam Adams varietals: The flagship Boston Lager, the Alpine Spring(which I discussed last week on this blog), and the Black IPA, which I found quaff able but far from transcendent, as I do all other IPAs. The tour guide suggested we take the trolley piloted by a 'crazy townie Sam Adams fan' to Doyle's an iconic Boston pub which was one of the first to sell Sam Adams. Awesome fucking food, and I got a chance to sample some Sam Adams that is made specifically for Doyle's, and is unavailable elsewhere.

Despite my initial lack of Willy Wonka-esque awe, the brewery was a great tour, with great people, and most importantly: Great Beer.

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New shit coming down the pike...

>> Monday, February 20, 2012

Some exciting stuff has been in the works! We have had some amazing submissions to the site from some incredible writers and poets. The announcement for the 1st print issue will be posted on March 1st. The search for a cover model is on. New merch is in the store. We are in the planning stages of the first release of Drunken Absurdity Records. Me, Ben Smith, and Jimmy Gerrard have started the International Paper Camera Project.

And I wish to announce the commencement of a personal project of mine, my next book( the other two poetry chaps are a work in progress still, as well as the Drunken Absurdity Cookbook). It's called "Out Past The Electric Lights", and I am very excited about it. It's a sixty day streaming consciousness essay project kicking off March 1st. So, basically, every single day for 60 days, I will sit down to write a completely raw and unedited channeling of thoughts from my screwy mind, minimum of 500 words, but up to 1500.What is ever there after 60 days will be published, and the only editing will be spellcheck. Absolutely no revisions. This will be difficult, I think, but also pretty awesome by the end.

SO there you have it fuckers.

Long Live our Glorious Revolution

-AJS

I also wish to announce 

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Be Careful Bitches!

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Another new alliance of the Revolution made

>> Saturday, February 18, 2012



Big thanks to James and the rest of the cats at Over The CounterCulture Mag for picking up one of my essays for their Issue #3. They got a real sweet thing going on over there, I def reccomend everyone check em out. True Revolutionaries, they are. Look for their Editor in Chief James to be featured in the near future on our YouTube channel doing a special Drunken Rant.

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if you think I'm sexy......

You wish you could look this good as an unemployed writer






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My Patrick Bateman moment

The other day I opened a small parcel from Australia containing the disposable camera from Ben John Smith for the project he and I are doing, along with Jimmy Gerrard, for Nothing But The Truth (NBTT). After removing the camera, and begin to brainstorm on what horrid things to take pictures of, Ben Smith's new business card came tumbling out too.

Now, Ben and I have been close friends and allies for quite some time now. I consider him a brother and a compatriot. But when I viewed his card: I was instantly stricken with jealousy. Perfect weight, crisp print, solid base color, great half naked model on the back, a commanding logo and address label on the front....It was truly glorious. My breath was robbed at the sheer power of such a small act of perfection. And I immediately knew that my old card, tried and true as it was, simply would no longer do.

And being the jealous cunt that I am, I ordered new cards haha. So, here is my new official business cards. I like them almost as much as Ben's. Pretty close. Be warned Ben, your days of business card supremacy are numbered....



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The search for a cover model:

>> Friday, February 17, 2012



The search for a cover girl for the first Drunken Absurdity print issue is underway! Ladies, if you want a shot at the cover and a $200 prize, send pics to drunkenabsurdity@gmail.com . Scantily clad is encouraged, but no frontal nudity. All pics will go on our DA facebook page, and the fans will vote on their fave. Whoever has the most votes by May 1st wins, that simple! We welcome all types: Alt models, stoner chicks, BBWs, Girl Next Door types...Its all good! Send them pics in and lets find our girl...

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New writers on Drunken Absurdity!

>> Thursday, February 16, 2012



Come stop by Drunken Absurdity today and check out our amazing new Revolutionaries Kimmy G, Rodman, Mike, and Philip, and some new work from Vl Sheridan and Ryan Quinn Flanagan!

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New Posters are in!!!

>> Wednesday, February 15, 2012



THE NEW MARILYN MISERY POSTERS HAVE ARRIVED, AND ARE READY FOR PURCHASE ON THE DRUNKEN ABSURDITY STORE! EVERY DOLLAR EARNED GOES TOWARD OUR PUBLICATION OF THE VERY FIRST PRINT EDITION OF DA, SO COME BY THE STORE AND HELP SUPPORT ALTERNATIVE LIT AND ART!!

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We've all been there

>> Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Yea you take it, you dirty slut statue



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another great video from our friend The Marine at AFT..



You will have to change your name to the "Holy Shit why do I have a boot shaped crater where my nutsack used to be-Man".....

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Def my favorite song from "Daybreak"

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Some Monday morning beer review coming at ya

>> Monday, February 13, 2012


Picked up a Sam Adams Brewmaster Choice pack at Bottles in Provdence yesterday. I am one of those weird Sam Adams fans, where I enjoy their seasonal and brewmaster brands, but am not the biggest fast of their flagship Boston Lager. I do respect and idolize Jim Koch for the amazing visionary he is, and returning the voice of quality to American beers after decades of us being the laughing stock of the world in beer making. Boston Lager is a good, well-made beer. That is certain. I am just saying, it is not my first choice at most New England bars.

But today I thought I would discuss a couple of these brews in the pack.




1. The Whitewater IPA: I am not a big fan of IPA. I respect the historic significance of IPA, but the strong hops and low filter has always been a problem for me. Sam Adams tends to be a very strong beer in hops levels to begin with. It really comes out in their Whitewater IPA. Thick heavy taste of spice sits on your tongue, and chases the beer down your throat with a burn. A bit of sour aftertaste. I have had worse IPAs I suppose. The quality is there, the love is there, but I do not appreciate the taste of any IPA.

2. The Alpine Spring: Very surprised with this unfiltered lager. Crisp,light, and flavorful, just the right balance of spice. The Noble Tettnag hops gives it just the right amount of citrus and floral aroma and aftertaste. Really a perfect beer to start drinking after a long winter of heavy ales and stouts. Refreshing and clean

3. The Mighty Oak Ale. The way this poured out of the bottle, in almost a syrup like stream, got me excited. By far the best balanced beer Jim Koch has ever made, in my humble opinion. That perfect sweet malt mixes with the earthy undertones of oak aging and English hops to create an explosion of flavor heavy with soul, without drowning itself in the process. Smooth dry finish. Winner of the 2011 Beer Lovers Choice Campaign.

4. And finally, the Black Lager. The Sam Adams version of a traditional German schwarzbier, the crisp cousin( means literally Black Beer) of the heavier English porters and stouts. Of course my favorite of the group, for anyone that knows my tastes. Heavy, rich, coffee and cream flavors and consistency from the dehusked malts. A tidal wave of heavy notes released from the bottom fermenting lager yeast. Traditional German noble hops give you that crisp bite Sam Adams fans expect, with a bolder profile. Delicious.


 

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some great new fan pics

>> Sunday, February 12, 2012





come check out the Drunken Absurdity FB page for more

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A true hero, the loyal military spouse....

>> Saturday, February 11, 2012

I wish I would have had one of those. Instead, I came home from my 3rd combat tour in 3 years to an empty trashed house, and no wife or children. I will never  forgive that disgrace. No one should ever come home from war to an empty house and bottle of scotch. It is sad that so many treacherous military wives give the amazing ones such a bad name.


The night before the burial of her husband 2nd Lt. James Cathey of the United States Marine Corps, killed in Iraq, Katherine Cathey refused to leave the casket, asking to sleep next to his body for the last time. The Marines made a bed for her, tucking in the sheets below the flag. Before she fell asleep, she opened her laptop computer and played songs that reminded her of him, and one of the Marines asked if she wanted them to continue standing watch as she slept. "I think it would be kind of nice if you kept doing it" she said. "I think that's what he would have wanted".

-Not sure what is more honorable: Being married to this faithful wife to the end, or the Marine standing next to the casket watching over them, or both.


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Huge tits save a life



A woman is crediting her record-setting 38KKK bosom for saving her life after she wrapped her car around a tree.
Sheyla Hershey, of Houston, Tx., reported that she was driving to pick up her husband after a Super Bowl party when she lost control of her car and slammed into a tree.
She said the airbags in her Ford Mustang didn't go off — which could have meant serious injury for most people.
But Hershey, who, according to her website, was named as having the largest augmented breasts by her native Brazil's equivalent of the Guiness Book of World Records, says she was saved by her silicone.
“My implants saved my life, my breasts are very sore and I have some scratches on them but I know I would have been badly hurt without them because they are very close to the steering wheel,” she said.
At the time of the crash, Hershey said she was taking drugs for depression, bipolar disorder, vicodin for a headache and a painkiller for the back pain.
She may face charges for driving under the influence of prescription drugs, and was arrested at the scene.

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Very disappointed

>> Friday, February 10, 2012

We are very sorry to see one of our Revolutionaries leave us, after receiving some obviously horrible advice from her supposed 'manager'. We respect and value our artists contributions to the alternative and counter-culture community, and are loyal and stalwart allies to those in the Drunken Absurdity family, so it pains us to see a member of that family being manipulated. Furthermore, if you are a supposed'manager'for one of our writers or artists, and send me an illiterate and derogatory email referring to yourself as a 'Master' to a 'Slave' ( our Revolutionary) we will not take you seriously.I will not help perpetuate a cycle of manipulation. Myself, and all other members of the Drunken Absurdity staff will deal only with writers and other artists directly.

We wish our former Revolutionary luck in future endeavors.

-AJS
Editor in Chief

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haunting

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Big Ass Titties!!!!!

>> Thursday, February 9, 2012






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Oh......my.....god

>> Tuesday, February 7, 2012

You know how I know Drunken Absurdity has hit the big time?!?! Ron Jeremy follows only 150 people on Twitter.....and I'm one of them. Let that sink in...

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!!!!!!

>> Monday, February 6, 2012

70,000 motherfuckin views!! Keep this shit rolling...

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A mission statement....

>> Sunday, February 5, 2012


At this point in time, I wish to make a, well.....mission statement about where Drunken Absurdity is and where I want it to be. This humble little experiment began as just an idea; a place for me to put some of my own work that has been rejected by supposed 'alternative' ezines and mags. And the work of some of my drunken friends. That was all.

But we have somehow moved past our simple origin. We have some of the best writers and poets in the world, I believe. Talented and tormented souls whose work is both shocking and brutal in its honesty and magnetism. We have fans on all continents. We have beatiful girls modeling for us. And these things make me ponder, just what the fuck are we doing???

My goal is for Drunken Absurdity to be a lifestyle magazine. Not a literature journal, or poetry mag, or art ezine, or porno rag. But all of these things, somehow blended and molded together in a grand stew of art,filth,obscenity,raw talent, and earnest desire to create. The older I get the more I realize just how many others there are like me out there. Souls who grew up with punk and hardcore music, grew up reading Thompson, Buk, Burroughs, Kerouac, and more. Who shy away from the mainstream not to make some sort of ironic hipster statement, but rather that we just do not FIT in. We come from all ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds. Different languages and vices. Different sexual pervesions. Some heavily tattooed and pierced, some suit wearing and shaved. But one thing, just one fucking thing, links us all. We are Freaks. We care not for self attention, academic credentials, or pedigree. We are those who drink for breakfast, who shock our freinds and family with our work, those who feel that something just isn't quite right with how we fit in with the world around us, a chronic lack of sync with contemporary society. We tend to self medicate with drugs and alcohol, not for fun, but as a necessary lubricant to ease into daikly function in a world we feel disassociated with.

But our curse is our blessing, for we are able to create and love unique writing, poetry, music, pornography, photography, and art without a care for the opinoins of mainstream society.

Drunken Absurdity will always be a home for people like us, the Freaks. I will publish what I love, and that love is spread throughout the spectrum of filthy and classy. And I will never shun those who just wish to create what they have burning in their souls, not because they enjoy it, but because they fucking have to spew it out to survive.

We will be the lifestyle mag for those with fucked up lifestyles. And that I promise you all

-Adam Schirling
Editor in Chief
Drunken Absurdity

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hahahahahahahha ok ok one more

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hahahahahahahahahahahah







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some more love from down under......

>> Saturday, February 4, 2012

Ben John Smith, you are one crazy Aussie fuck, and we love you...



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one last one...

>> Friday, February 3, 2012

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Proud to have been asked to officially wear these colors.....

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Introducing: Marilyn Misery



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tattoos

>> Thursday, February 2, 2012

stopped by anchor steam today to get a little work done, some small filler pieces on my right arm. Consulted with my good friend and official DA artist Tom Butts on the next few tattoos up in the lineup...

todays work


these two runic symbols will be my neck tattoos, one on each side. Hopefully get them done next month


then there is my right hand and knuckles, which should be next month as well. We were going to try and squeeze the DA logo on my hand, but it will not work, so I have decided to keep the pirate flag theme I have on my left hand (Blackbeards flag) and do the flag of my next favorite pirate John Phillips

and for the knuckles I will be doing the Jameson family crest motto, latin for "without fear"

"SINE METU"

so there ya have it, my tattoo to do list for the next 3 months. I am trying to get them all knocked out fast so I can start asap on the full leg sleeze Troma piece Tom and I have been brainstorming on over drinks for a friggin year. VERY stoked about that...



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About Me

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New England, United States
Freelance writer and poet. Founder and Editor in Chief of Drunken Absurdity. President of Drunken Absurdity LLC

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